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turkey day!   
09:37pm 24/11/2005
mood: feed me
eat the turkey biatches! or ham..... n if ur a vegatarian.. then dont. today was cool. i got to meat more of timmys fam. a lil awkward but i suvived n im now invted for xmas so cool beans. im so full yet so hungry n it suxs. i could eat a freakin house but thats ok. thats what diets r for leter so im gonna indulge! yes!um other than that.. food food. *zombie* food. food food food food...blood. i mean food

like i said. someones punk ass better gimmy a call.. lol jp but it be nice i dont have anyones nubers ya know.. new phone so... yeah
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i miss yall   
12:17am 22/11/2005
mood: miss yall
i miss everyone so much! its been so long since ive otten on the pc and well.. i never see any of my freinds anymore. Rossie ur still my hbots nad i miss u like crazy. gimmy a call. i still talk to meggy and muffin. but everyone els.. i never talk to u guys. anyone... gimmy a call i fixed my cell finally..broke it at otakon. call me yo! 443 299 2152. XOX
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finger lickin good   
07:00am 16/09/2005
Who will give you an orgasm?
by sweetdork
So, who will make you moan?Christina Aguilera
Will it be good?Sure buddy.
Quiz created with MemeGen!
04:11pm 15/09/2005
  The Wayward Heart
- You Are The Wayward Heart

"Feel Better."

You are best described as 'Emotional Support'.
Anytime an emotional issue comes up or
something stresses people out, you are there to
help them feel better about it. Whether you are
the prankster of the bunch, the funny one, the
wild one, or just the shoulder to cry on - your
traits favor what it takes to keep people
going. You like large groups of people and have
many friends. When something hits home for you,
however, you have a hard time with it. You also
have difficulty paying attention or focusing on
one thing. Above all, though, if people are
happy, you are happy.

Which Classic Story Role Do You Play?
brought to you by Quizilla

wow i love it wen these thingies work
im alive!!!   
03:36pm 15/09/2005
mood: my leg is asleep
yeah it been a while. not too long ago i got realy sick. it started out with the flue? i suppose it was the flue.. it shure as hell felt like it. that realy kicked me in the ass that sunday. after that i just called out of work everyday. (at this time i had two jobs) then on wed. tim called to inform me he would be leaving to go to new orleans. thats great. so thursday moring was my first time out of the house. it was sad. if his mom hadnt been in the car i think i woulda cried. oh yeah um on that sunday i wnet to patient first... they told me i had tonsilitus? sp but wtf yeah oooooook. um i went to my docts on monday n shes like ur sick.. but ur pale n bla so she made me go get blood work wich wasnt fun. it just told me my white blood cell level was low. i coulda told ya that.. then i was just sick. i was feeling better friday.. i started to eat food. but then sunday morning i woke up with a realy bad headach. i just collaped then proceeded to vomit. i threw up from 10am to about 1pm when my mom decided to take me to the hospital... omg she almost killed this guy in the waiting room. my mother is so violent. well they take ppl by priority there n nothing was broken on me so i sat out there for three hours untill thye took me back. now i dont like needels. i dont know why. i know they dont hurt i have 50 million freakin holes in my body BUT i do not like needles. the lady came in to give me my iv. lol i cried my ass off. then bla we sat there forever in mad discofort. i got a catscan for my head n then my doct was like "oh im anel u might have menengitus(SP?) lets do a spinal tap on u" fuck no man. im thinkin not. its like 10pm n i wanna go home shes like im gonna give u a sedative. bf she gave it to me i sat there for another 20min cryn lol n then they gave me 1mg of something n not even five min later shes in havein me unch over on some table so she can do this. ahh im still awake... when she injects me with the morophine that was it that hurt so bad its right on ur spine omg that hurt. lol so she gave me another mg. like they think its gonna work roght then? wtf doc. so shes back terhe taken my fluids out. now let me tell u that was the most uncofortable thing ever. by the time the med kicked in i was so fucked up. we ended up sitting there till 12am cause they messed up on the tests. all this to find out that my infection i had bf just backed up into my sinuses n now i have a realy bad sinus infection.. joy? n some level of something is realy high in my liver. oh boy more tests. n then i had to quite my one job cause my mother got a job n now i must take care of matty in the morings so no moring job for me. ah the wonders of hell. yeah that was about the past two weeks. being sick. lol
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and a lie and a lie and a lie   
05:36am 24/08/2005
mood: fuck me
i dont realy know what to do any more. i cant figure out whos lieing to me anymore. it seems like everyone n there brother is lieing to me about something. i meen well i dont know i think my bf is cheating on me but then again i dont think he is cause well everyones stories seem so true and right but theres flaus everywere and i just want to put my trust were it should be but im just so scared im wrong and i dont want to lose what i have but i dont wanna be usee.. god why does everything have to be so fucking complicated
03:33am 23/08/2005
mood: sigh
otakon was great. i made some realy cool awsum freinds like ryan reikishy travis anna emma jeff not dan lol n just random ppl i ran into n talked to alot it was awsum i met steven n his freind shannon n well i got to see a lot of ppl i didnt normaly see like on jordan n lew n lots of ppl. in teh long run otakon was a hell of a lot better this year than it was lst year. n i bought mad cool stuff lol. on the downfall. i droped my phone while it was open n pre reg line... now its broken n two n wont work. there was a verizon store inbetween our hotel n teh convention but was it opend... no so im still cell phoneless it suxs. yep so thats it for now.... or all that i can say
01:47pm 01/08/2005
  i need a new motehr fucking sn for my aim grr cause im gettin rid of aol n gettin dsl.. well that meens im losein my sn.... all fine n dandy but what do i use now? umm grrrrr easter bunnie no ive already used that then well i dont know help help help help help help plz sombody anybody squirrlei<3u thats is motehr dfucker!!! fuck fuck fuck a duck screw a kangaroo finger bange an orangatang an orgey at teh zoo  
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05:45am 26/07/2005
mood: stupid brain work
things alway seem to get so complicated lol i find myself saying that alot but life isnt aloud to be simple i suppose lol. well april posted this n i thought ide pass it on cause well yeah shes right this is absolutely true 100% true well its for girls but as she said, guys should take it to heart.

I Want A Boy...

...who can wrestle with me
and let me win.

...who can, when wrestling,
after letting me win, suddenly
flip me over and sit on me.

...who i can talk to about anything

...who laughs at my jokes.

...who puts my cold hands
in his warm hoodie pockets.

...who lets me use his sweatshirt
for a pillow.

...who says i love you & means it.

...who will kiss me in the rain,
in the sunshine, and in the snow.

...whos calls unexpectedly.

...who will have many inside jokes
with me and remember each one.

...a boy who notices haircuts.

...who realizes that i say things
but dont always mean them.

...who can tell me his problems
and let me help.

...who will listen to me talk

...who saves his genuine, big smiles for me.

...with deeps eyes,
that can see through faces into depths.

...who gives me his t-shirt to change into
and not expect to get it back.

...who knows my full name--
first, middle and last.

...who willl know when something is wrong
when im trying my best to put on an act

...who will kiss me and
tell me im beautiful.

...who will let me cry to him.

...who will hold me& kiss my cheek.

...who suprises me and compliments
and plays with my hair.

...who will brag about me
to all of his friends

...not afraid to give me a great big hug
right infront of his mom

...who smells like
he just stepped out of the shower.

...who wears cologne that i can subtly
smell when im leaning on his shoulder.

...who tells me i have a nice laugh
and a smile that lights up the room
and simply be mine to hold.

see.... :P
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05:51am 24/07/2005
mood: yawn
um.. yawn today was boring i just worked and cleand my room. yeah. yawn....
05:38am 23/07/2005
mood: ^^
ok i back from GA it was a lot of fun. i realy like my new relatives. there realy cool lol. um leavin was awful tho i cried. i didnt wanna leave my daddy. um nuttin has realy been happinin lately. tim n i had our 2 month anaversary. two months man.... yeah i made dinner n we had some wine. ah omg lol amanda had a bon fire n i went n it was like 3 n the moning n she wips out the rum well bye then most everyone was gone. she had never drank bf n i was realy causous about her. lol i gave her a tiny bit n mixed it with wahat was avalibl being apple juice. she got drunk off nothing then wanted more. i knew she couldnt hack it so i drank like all of it. i got so sick but i did it for her i guess. i suppose u had tob e there to get it. but i threw up out of my nose n joey zimmers took care of me witch is realy funny. wel i came home at nine n the morn n went right to sleep cause i felt like shit.. duh lol n sllept till 1 n the after noon n got pissed cause i had stuff to do.. now im grouneded i have been grounded for ever. she took my cell phone from me n told me i can see tim. im so mad grr. peace!!
02:56pm 01/07/2005
  just wanted to let everyone know that i was leavin for gorgia today with my mom ass wipe matty n tim. my dad is gettin married n all that shit so yep. bubye  
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06:13am 24/06/2005
  hey look lol i decided to get on the pc. boy do i have a lot of shit to say. ok lets start with senior week........

well lets just say it wasnt all it cracked up be. we fought most of the time we got stuckin the mudd. n well i dont know but i know it wasnt much fun. u want more details ask me. n im still mad at u chris. what u did was awful!!!!!!!!! n disrespectful to ely and i.

my dad is gettin married. um kevin(step) mom, matt(lil bro), tim (bf), n i are drivin down to goarga for it. fun fun fun care ride

i had so much to say but i dont realy feel like sayin it now lately the shit has hit the fan.. been wiped up n thrown on the floore. gd mood swings lol there a bitch lol. :P
im srry   
02:21pm 08/06/2005
mood: its kinda like that
world i am srry for anyone i may have called last night. i know i left numorouse long voice mails on ppls cell phones. lol i was rather out of it we can say but i asu i had a good reason. no excuse but a good reason. isnt that how it always is tho. yeah well srry yall. love ya lots. im off to deal with life....:P
01:55pm 06/06/2005
PURITY: 52% sex, 40% substance, 66% moral [53% total]
Well done! The higher your scores, the more "pure" you are. The lower, the more you've experienced.

This test was about done deeds, so your numbers will never climb. [It's interesting to think they all started at 100%.] But will your purity continue to fall? Will you OUTGROW or will you OUTDO your past experiences? It's up to you.


  • Don't date anyone if your moral purities differ by more than 30%.
  • Don't run a business with anyone if your substance purities differ by more than 40%.
  • Do be friends with someone who has less than 1/2 your sex purity. You'll enjoy their colorful company.

Note: as for the "TOTAL" purity value - that's a weighted combination of your scores, indicating what a typical purity test might say about you.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 11% on substance

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 20% on sex

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 36% on moral

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 18% on TOTAL
Link: The 3-Variable Purity Test written by chriscoyne on Ok Cupid
02:42pm 02/06/2005
  hahahahahha all yall r at the dumb senior pictnic!!! n im at home eatin yummy baked beans!! n just got $350 woot. grad money. dud guess what! we graduate tomorrow no way.. ack now i must clean so i can go to work..... yeah joy.  
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how i feel... exactly how i feel   
11:53pm 30/05/2005
  soul asylum- runaway train

Call you up in the middle of the night
Like a firefly without a light
You were there like a blowtorch burning
I was a key that could use a little turning

So tired that I couldn't even sleep
So many secrets I couldn't keep
I promised myself I wouldn't weep
One more promise I couldn't keep

It seems no one can help me now,
I'm in too deep; there's no way out
This time I have really led myself astray

Runaway train, never going back
Wrong way on a one-way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there

Can you help me remember how to smile?
Make it somehow all seem worthwhile
How on earth did I get so jaded?
Life's mystery seems so faded

I can go where no one else can go
I know what no one else knows
Here I am just a-drownin' in the rain
With a ticket for a runaway train

And everything seems cut and dried,
Day and night, earth and sky,
Somehow I just don't believe it

Runaway train, never going back
Wrong way on a one-way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there

Bought a ticket for a runaway train
Like a madman laughing at the rain
A little out of touch, a little insane
It's just easier than dealing with the pain

Runaway train, never going back
Wrong way on a one-way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there

Runaway train, never coming back
Runaway train, tearing up the track
Runaway train, burning in my veins
I run away but it always seems the same

dammit it was along weekend. i did somethings i whish i didnt do and somethings im happy i did. but in the end im just as fucking confused as ever
01:55pm 29/05/2005
  hmmm yeah... ^^ thats all i havbe to say

The Naiive
The Naiive

What human aspect fits your personality? (images)
brought to you by Quizilla
11:10pm 17/05/2005
mood: damn man
i am drunk off my ass. but u know wut! it feels good. like i went out with chris cristina n tim (exuse my bad typing lol i dont care) n like we spemnt two hrs tryin to find cristina some weed n we didnt but we did get a few hits off of some strawberry vodka n like my last hit she was like chug chug chug so i did. i shouldnt of. i went home drunk cause thye went home at ten n tim n i hung out lol n pissed on the side of the road toghter n compared piss spots. lol sh8it man i cant fuckin see straight. lol ok im gonna go talk to tim so like out yo
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11:00pm 15/05/2005
mood: contemplative
have u ever had the feeling that ur life was a wast of time. that u just needed to wipe the slate clean and stare a fresh. i feel like that now. like im in over my head and the shit is to thick to breath threw. everyone els i know are all like oph 5 more days 5 more days. but then wut. a bunch of fun events and then.. life. life, the deal life. or so it seems. but i dont like what life i have now. how am i to make it my full time job if i dislike it? im incredibuly unshure of what is to come of me at this point in time. i just feel like i need to shake off the old. no offence to all of my loving freinds but i feel like yall are wut is holding me back. its not ur fault at all, its my emmotional attachment. is sounds absolutlely horrid but i think its true. i dont know and thats bothering me. ive longed for so long for so many things but, all of that seems so unimportant anymore. like it wasnt even a pre requisit for what is to come. it was all less than that. i feel like a complete ass thinking this cause i know its not true but, i dont know. lol this is the kind of stuff that comes out when im completely out of it. doped up on too much meds and tired as hell. sigh if only life were simple. that would be the day.

A Note of Truth

When all our hopes are washed to sea,
And we have stopped at the foot of the bridge,
Long after our last storm paid its fea,
We may seek shelter.

When waves have swallowed the last grain of sand,
And we have said all things left to say,
When what gave us light, no longer shines,
Then people like us may have a day.

For it will be with us as with the fly,
The tolerance, the beauty and the beast;
We may come again to rebuild
One day, but not this day.

~brittany albright~

exactly how i feel. for the most part. except for the wiping clean. its funny how things u once felt seem so releavent. u think to urself. once u overcome something so great, that thats the end of that. wrong its not. it wil be with u till the day u die. that same resentment, that same pain. it never goes away. i just wish it would sometimes. im stopping now i sounds like a depressed psyhco lol and im not. :P
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